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Cherish Your Spouse

Jesus Is Coming: Love and Cherish Your Spouse!

Marital splits and squabbles could very well be one of the main reasons many Christians are not ready for the Rapture. If this sounds like an overstatement, just answer this question: Are Christian husbands and wives enjoying peace with God when they are at war with one another?

How does marital discontentment grow? Often when someone else’s spouse is cast in an idealized role by the person who is dissatisfied with their own marriage. Comparing your spouse with someone else’s is a journey into misery.

A discontented wife tells her husband, “My friend Mary Jo tells me that her husband always serves her breakfast in bed on Sunday mornings.” Of course, it is possible that Mary Jo’s husband does exactly that, but it is also possible that Mary Jo is saying that to make herself look good—she picked just the right man to be her husband. But the wife who tells her husband about Mary Jo’s husband needs to remember this: Even if Mary Jo’s husband does serve her breakfast in bed every Sunday, her husband may do ten other things that Mary Jo’s husband doesn’t do.

I used to pastor a church in the rolling hills of East Tennessee and drove an old Chevy truck. If I were to compare my truck with a fancy new sports car, the truck might not look too good. I might begin to complain about the faded paint job and about the rough ride and the different and sometimes strange noises that came from under the hood. I might complain about the rust spots and the extra squeaks and rattles that made it hard to listen to the radio.

Of course, a new sports car might have none of these “disadvantages.” But sound thinking would reveal that perhaps it was a skewered comparison. There were several things that the old truck would do that the sports car couldn’t. The truck was far better on dirt roads and hauling a load of firewood. I enjoyed more peace of mind driving the truck than if I had the sports car. Nobody would steal the old truck. I could park it at the mall and leave the keys in the ignition, but it was safe. Everyone steered clear from it.

I don’t mean to compare spouses with an old truck—that’s not the point– but the fact is the man, or woman, that we are married to probably has strengths and assets that we need, assets that we could not do without. That young lady in the office may be very attractive, but there is more to life than an attractive young lady.

Men and women often make comparisons between their spouses and someone else’s for the purpose of motivating by guilt. The message is: “Mary Jo’s husband is nice, but you are not. You ought to feel guilty about that and start treating me better.” Such is counterproductive and rarely, if ever, improves a marriage. Thank God for the spouse that you have and love him, or her, for Christ’s sake.

The Golconda diamond mine is known internationally. Some of the largest diamonds in the world have come from the Golconda. But there is an interesting legend that is built up around the mine that illustrates the point I am trying to make.

There was a man who lived many years ago by the name of Ali Hafed. He was by no means a poor man. He had a small farm and was doing quite well. One night he started to dream about diamonds. He believed that he could become very wealthy if he could find some diamonds. So, Ali Hafed sold his farm, took all his money, and decided to travel around the world in search of diamonds. He travelled far and near, exhausted all of his savings, but found no diamonds. He was fast becoming old and bitter, sadly disillusioned by his fruitless efforts. He was so brokenhearted and depressed that he walked into the ocean and was never seen again.

One day the new owner of Ali Hafed’s farm was watering his camel in the little stream that wound its way through the farm. As the camel was drinking, the new owner noticed a bright and shiny object at the bottom of the stream. The man reached into the water and found a huge diamond. He began to run his fingers through the sand on the bottom of the stream and found many more huge diamonds.

This is the legend that has come from antiquity with the discovery of one of the most productive diamond mines the world has ever known. The largest crown jewels come from the Golconda. Ali Hafed’s diamonds were under his feet—but he didn’t realize it. The moral of the story? Your marriage diamonds are in your own back yard. Don’t overlook them. Mine them.

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Larry Spargimino

Dr. Larry Spargimino is co-host of the SWRC broadcast and joined the ministry in 1998. Larry researches and writes books and articles for the ministry, assists on tours, and helps answer listeners' theological questions when they call the ministry. Larry holds a doctorate from Southwestern Theological Seminary in Fort Worth, Texas, and pastors a local church.

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